O, that evil, conniving New Year’s Eve. Long maligned as the most overrated holiday, it nonetheless manipulates seemingly rational people into making too many plans, spending beyond their means, and creating unreasonable expectations—year after year.

This December, the wiles of New Year’s Eve are being compounded by another equally persistent social force: Recessionists. Motivated by the emotional roller coaster that was 2008—from the election to the Subprime Mortgage Crisis to gas prices to Sarah Palin to, um, the Recession—these folks are pushing a New Year’s Eve agenda of extremes: either a) forget about New Year’s Eve and maybe you’ll forget 2008, too, or b) blow it out like there’s no tomorrow. (“Let’s Party Like it’s 1929” is a phrase so over-headlined, there’s a movement afoot to retire it.)

We’ve been through a lot this year, people. We need catharsis. Inspiration. A break. And - dare I say? - a drink! We deserve it. And just in the nick of time, a little thing called New Year’s Eve has come along to give us what we need.

So, this year, I am proposing something in between your run-of-the-mill, overrated 12/31, and that really sad, Armageddon Recessionist version: take advantage of it. Do what you will, but do something that is meaningful to you. Because, remember on Election Night, when everyone was saying, “This is a really big deal, right?” Well, it was. And just like Election Night, the passage of this year – this crazy, tragic, awe-inspiring 2008 – is a big deal. It merits celebration.

Here are some suggestions on making this New Year’s Eve one you’ll never forget:

1. Be yourself. If that means being BY yourself, singing Supremes hits into your hairbrush, so be it. If you want nothing more than to sit on a friend’s couch and watch Dick Clark, although you’ll have to settle for Ryan Seacrest, just do it. Find a rave. Kiss a stranger at midnight. Or kiss your dog at 9:00p and call it a night. But make it a uniquely YOU celebration, because even if this was your worst year ever, it needs to be acknowledged and put behind you.

2. Take matters into your own hands. If you put yourself into a New Year’s Eve situation that you can’t control – a friend’s house, a party, a restaurant – you can’t expect that person or place to deliver your perfect New Year’s Eve. So, make sure to deliver it to yourself. If a glass (or five) of bubbly is what you crave, bring that delicious bottle of Dom you’ve been saving. If you want to shake your moneymaker, offer the host your iPod. And if you want to play poker ‘til dawn, don’t let someone drag you to a karaoke party. Take control of your destiny.

3. Alleviate dress stress. The general rule of thumb is to wear something sparkly (or “sparkly” to you), and you’ll fit right in. But don’t take it from me; take some NYE fashion tips from an expert, like Jennifer Romolini from Yahoo’s Shine.

4. Reach out. New Year’s Eve is a night to connect. Even if you choose to pass the night on your own, elevate it above arbitrary by getting in touch with those important to you. Call your grandma, text your college roommate at midnight, or send your crush a groovy e-card.

And if you’re with friends or family…

5. …Give ‘em what they want. Since we’ve agreed that this year was a bear, we can also agree that everyone could use a little TLC on this night—so, make that your evening’s mission. Be forthcoming with compliments, healthy thanks, heartfelt comments, shout-outs, smiles, and smooches. You will get back what you give tenfold. And you need it as much as they do.

So, in conclusion (of this year and of this blog), do it up this New Year’s Eve. Make it your resolution to do something meaningful. Give New Year’s Eve its due; because this year, whether you gained or lost, you earned it.

Thanksgiving may be the Hallmark-inflicted time of the year to give thanks, but with our bank accounts depleted, job security in peril, and the threat of imminent depression — both financial and emotional! –upon us, gratitude may be the last thing on our minds.

Don’t let the forced holiday family time be an added burden.  Look at it this way: it’s stressful, but at least it’s consistently stressful. No matter what’s going on in the world, you can always depend on holiday time with family to be difficult!  Visitors feel out of their element, reunions with family members remind us of unresolved issues, group meal preparation brings out the control freak in the host, and we overeat and drink to compensate for all of the feelings incited by the above -– just to name a few of the potentially flammable situations at hand.

At risk of sounding too Pollyanna, I propose that we not only try to make the most of the inevitable, but make the best of it. After all, the holidays are going to happen, and the stress is going to happen – and it’s a whole lot easier to manage something you can predict (unlike, say, the financial markets!)

Here are a few things to try:

1)   Say it like you mean it. Say “thank you” as much as possible, even if you don’t feel grateful, even if you resent having to say it, even if it’s the last thing you want to do. The positive vibe you give off and the repetition of such a selfless phrase will transform your interactions with everyone and make you feel great about yourself.

2)   Make friends with your family. Pretend that you’ve never met your annoying brother-in-law before and get to know him. Ask your father to tell you about his childhood– again. Assure your mother that you’ll take her nagging suggestion under consideration (and act like you will.) If you treat your family members with the respect and objective interest you would a new friend – tabling, rather than lingering upon, your history for a brief moment – you will actually learn things you didn’t know, gain respect for and from these people, and open up a new side of your relationships with them. Who knows? You might even avert a stressful confrontation.

3)   “Lean in.” In The Psychology of Achievement, Brian Tracy puts forth that any topic or person, no matter how seemingly boring or uninteresting, will miraculously become the opposite, if you simply lean in and pay attention to it/him/her for 5 minutes straight. Put this to the test – particularly when you’re seated to Old Man Clunker at the turkey table. It works!

4)   Walk in her stilettos. Take a moment outside of your own stress to empathize with your fellow family members’ version of it. You may be irritated that you have to work around your sister’s schedule, but she may be frustrated that she has to juggle her regular home life with entertaining you. Your brother may be worried about his next paycheck. Your grandmother may not be feeling well. The aforementioned annoying brother-in-law may be missing his own family. Keeping these possibilities in mind – and all the things you don’t know about – will help you be empathetic instead of judgmental when things get heightened or conflictual.

5)   Take a break. Family + holidays + close quarters = a perfect storm. Divert that storm by breaking up the 24/7 togetherness. Take a walk. Explore the neighborhood. Just step out of the room, if that’s as far as you can get. And encourage others to do the same. Being around anyone  – especially your family – for too long, without pausing for a moment to yourself, to reflect or to decompress, can be hazardous to your relationships. Don’t worry: you won’t miss anything, and you’ll all be better off for it.

Finally, share these suggestions with your family members in advance of your time together. Actively acknowledging that every family – no matter how loving and perfect! -  encounters issues during the holidays could actually diffuse the stress before it starts.

Oh, and THANK YOU very much for reading this! I am GRATEFUL for your interest! I APPRECIATE your attention.